oh im 36 hours sober in chicago

lost my damn phone

homeless man offered me a cigarette 

his home doesnt define him or the smoke

but i still said no 

*i dont need a substance for catharsis 

 

been asking, what makes you feel thoughtless? what brings you to that trance, the embodiment of body, meditation of mind, eternal patience

that feeling of what existence was like before life, before the big bang, its all the same place its all the same trip 

meditation=before life=before creation

it cant be explained i cant explain 

idfk

cant find that place of thoughtlessness 

not without substance 

/substance substance sometimes sex mostly

substance

 

change in

meditation 

influences the whole equation 

a plague on life = a plague in the creation i exist in 

cant find that place

broke in

meditation=broken life=broken creation

just need those dopamine* levels back

june 24th, 2021

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